I love

That today is my Friday.  I've been way too emotional this week.

Lack of a new job/stress + missing Clayton + TOM = emotional Heather.

But having a 3 day work week makes life some better, at least at the moment. 

What has been a huge victory for me this week? Tracking everything.  Even if I did have too much chocolate yesterday, I tracked it all.  That is huge for me. In the past if I didn't track it, it didn't exist.  But the last 2 weeks I've gained 5.6, and I was only about 3 pounds from my initial starting weight.  So this week I started over. I lost 2.2 of what I had gained.  I know that I MUST make it a priority or it isn't going to happen. 

About a month ago, right around my birthday, I broke down to Clayton and explained to him my weight issues and how it has been an issue since before I can really remember-I was always the overweight kid from
basically elementary school. And how it has affected me all these years.  I had never told anyone I've been in a relationship before all of this, not even way back when I was engaged.  He was very responsive and supportive, even through the "I love you how you are" and "you don't have to change anything for me".  Which I already knew, but I can now honestly say I'm doing this for ME.  And realizing that was huge.  I could never really say that before this point. 

Here is to a(nother) new beginning!  But I'm for real this time.  I can't explain it, but my mindset and emotion about it is completely different this time!

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